Making our Days
I took a seminary elective in arts and media where we studied some of the creative exercises developed by Corita Kent, a former Sister of the Catholic church turned teacher at Immaculate Heart College. The exercises are recorded in a book titled, “Learning by Heart,” which I recommend to anyone interested in developing their faith through creative play; they are a collection of some of the ways Kent engaged with her students, and easy to follow if you want to practice new things.
But the book goes beyond instructions, also explaining why such exercises matter. And it begins, perhaps surprisingly, with this framing:
“To create means to relate. The root meaning of the word art is to fit together, and we all do this every day… whether it is to make a load a bread, a child, a day… We make our own lives every day.”
This is a beautiful thought. But it also helped me to understand the overlap between two areas of gifting and passion that I find myself talking about a lot: Art and Formation.
Recently, I convinced a friend to move to a different neighborhood. I was talking about why I love the area I live: how important it was to me that I would be somewhere with widely-used public transit, how much I valued living somewhere multicultural, and what’s important to me about being able to walk places. All of these values (and several more) have led me to stay in Astoria 7.5 years because I see how they all play a role in my formation. I am formed by bumping shoulders with strangers in the subway, by the constant sound of different languages and constant sights of different faiths, by the slow, observational rhythm of walking by grids of windows.
I was surprised that my friend was thinking about moving afterwards, but her reasoning was simple. She said she’d never thought about the place she lived as forming her in a particular way, and certainly never thought about picking a place based on how she wanted to be formed.
She’s not the only one; many people I talk to focus on how to get the most square-footage for the smallest price with the shortest commute time, but stare blankly when I ask them other questions about what it’s like to be in their neighborhood.
Similarly, people stare blankly when I ask questions about what types of values are forming them in their routines, in their churches, in their jobs… There are a lot of things we have to “fit together” in our lives, and these things become the molds by which we shape ourselves.
Such a concept feels intuitive to me. Perhaps, Kent showed me, because I am an artist. I understand life as something you “make,” not something you “do,” and certainly not just something that happens to you without rhyme or reason.
This reframing is super empowering! What people do you want forming you? Ask them to hang out. What places do you want shaping you? Start there. What do you want to care about the most? Put your money into that first.
Being stuck in a cycle of just reacting to life is understandable, but I also think it’s not necessarily “just the way it is.” A lot of the rules for success in your own life are determined by, well, you.
I mean, let’s look at how I’ve made my life. A small New York apartment? No husband? Bedtime? Strict budgeting? Studying and writing papers day in and day out? These things are probably not for everyone ;) But I’ve picked them because I like how they’re forming me. I think my life is beautiful, even if someone else might not think so. What resources do you have? How do you want them to form you? Your time, your relationships, your home… All these things are shaping you. Take a beat to reflect on how. Are you growing more selfish or selfless? More or less trusting? More or less open-minded?
How can you craft your life to make it beautiful for you?
